My Birthday This Year...

Hey everyone, 

I guess I really haven't written anything for a while.

It's my 23rd year this year, and this year's birthday really was something. Not because of the presents I received, nor the way I celebrated, but because of how I feel I've grown up.

Deep inside I'm always a naive young child, oblivious to the greater more dangerous world. But having grown up in tough environments, tough on mentality and emotion rather than physically, I've developed a stronger, more rational side of my personality.

And naturally, these two sides battle their way through my heart and mind a lot of the times; trying to rationalise my ideals and dreamworld, meanwhile trying to inspire and inject creativity to my logic.

But I realise, no matter what, I've learnt to become more and more grateful, and appreciative of what I have and what I'm given. Also, I'm more and more accepting and realising my short comings and my weaknesses as opposed to denying them or ignoring them.

This year I really do feel I've learnt a lot about myself, and am making minute steps to self-improvement and actually achieving them.

I'm now 23, and although I have already been through a lot, there is a long long way ahead of me, and I am now determined to make the best of it in every way; studies, career, filial piety, hobbies etc...

This post sounds grim huh? Especially for a birthday post? Hehe, don't worry. It's a good thing. Self reflection and self criticism is something that motivates me to work harder. But what makes me really happy this year... is that I'm finally getting closer to a happier me. I love the new direction I'm going towards, despite everything is uncertain and unclear, despite having less and less time for my music which I love dearly with all my heart. 

It's because I see my family happier with what I'm doing now, and them not having to worry about me anymore that makes me at ease. No, I'm not doing this because of them, I'm doing this because of myself, but knowing that they are happy reassures me that I'm going to be ok.

Switching from Music to Business was a great leap, and I still feel as if I'm suspended in mid-air, about to fall any minute if I make a wrong move. But somehow, the risk and the uncertainty just feels right.

I'm just going with the flow... sometimes you got to do that, right?

It's going to be a fun, exciting, dangerous new year with a better, new improved me. I've learnt to embrace change with determination and learnt to really appreciate things I used to be ignorant about.

22 years old? 23 years old? It's only one year... but this year... I feel like a new person. Purer and truer to myself, but wiser and more experienced.

Learn more about yourself, Love yourself, Be happy. (*^-^*)

I feel like the luckiest girl alive... and this year is just the start of it!